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| Abeeku Mugatu is the first democratically elected leader in Nambia's history (File Photo) |
Sankantia, Nambia
Forget about North Korea and the ongoing Russia investigation for a moment. The Prime Minister of The Republic of Nambia has issued a warning to American President Donald Trump, mere days after Trump praised the reclusive nation.
PM Abeeku Mugatu, the first democratically elected leader in Nambia’s illustrious history, vowed on Friday that he would place crippling tariffs on covfefe exports if they are not installed as a full-fledged member of the United Nations immediately.
Nambia is the world’s largest exporter of the popular morning beverage which the American President and his staff consume religiously. Covfefe, a Nambian word meaning “one who tweets at all hours of the day,” is known primarily for its caffeine content, but health experts have recently warned about disturbing side effects, such as the inability to form complete sentences as well as acute narcissism.
“For too long, my country has shunned the rest of the world, but now after our first democratic elections, my team and I have decided that we must engage with the international community,” said Mugatu. “I am confident that world leaders, particularly Mr. Trump, will push for our inclusion in the UN instead of having us cut off their precious covfefe supply.”
In response, the American President tweeted on Friday afternoon: “Just praised PM Mugatu and Nambia the other day, now threatens me. Very sad. Huge fan of covfefe.”
At press time, no resolution to the matter had been reached.
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